Why I Left The Sea Org

Peter Aruba Beach

Crimes And Suppression In The Sea Org

Summed up in two words: I left because I felt suppresseLaurel wreathd and restricted and I didn’t see a chance for change.

Of course in the Sea Org this doesn’t count as a reason for leaving, as “a person with a clean heart cannot be hurt” and a person is “at full cause over everything that happens to him” and a thetan (the name for the spirit in Scientology) has the ultimate ability “to make everything right”.

In Scientology viewpoint there are two reasons someone leaves the Sea Org:

  1. Harmful acts or omissions committed by a person that are withheld. This is quoted as the main reason.
  2. Being under suppression or being a suppressive person. Under this second point, only suppression from the outside is considered, as members are totally blind to suppression from inside, as this “doesn’t exist” – Sea Org people are “white hats”.

And I don’t even argue with the validity of these reasons – the problem only lies in what you accept as a harmful act and what you accept as suppression. It all goes back to the old question of what’s right and what is wrong.

Harmful Acts

The Church specializes in imposing rules onto its members, especially staff, that most outsiders would consider crazy. Many of these rules were never written or approved by its Founder, L. Ron Hubbard and didn’t go through the approval lines set by him, but were approved only locally. Especially Flag (Clearwater) specializes in such rules, see examples here. Staff members hate these rules and violate them constantly. When staff violate such rules and do not speak about this, they will have a “withhold”. It easy to see that these are artificially created “sins” and life in the Sea Org could be greatly improved just by stripping away all these crazy rules.


The Church and its members also incorrectly define what is considered suppressive. E. g.: Having to stay up all night to sell books and then come on post at 8:30 am is not considered suppressive.  It is justified by the highest possible purpose of helping this planet. The purpose always justifies the methods used. Getting punished by your high seniors is not considered suppressive, as organization staff are never approved as suppressive unless declared so by Ethics. And finally, anyone who raises their voice trying to effect a major change to these crazy practices WILL BE declared suppressive by Ethics.


The result: With the policy of mandatory disconnection of members from those declared suppressive, thousands of regular people are artificially cut from their families.

There Is Only One Possibility for Correction

To top this, there is no appeal. Naturally you have the apparent right to appeal: declared supressives can always ask for a review of such sentence, however these cases will be judged by committees appointed from members of the Church that don’t see out of the box and will most certainly fail.

The only correction in these matters can come from the top, like this, a story that happened to a friend of mine and he told me personally:

In the days when we were staying up until 5 am for months, he looked very tired and David Miscavige asked him, “How much did you sleep last night?”

He very respectfully answered with a no-answer, “Sir, I slept more than the night before.”

DM then made a comment: “If you let staff members sleep, maybe they would produce more.”

That day was a life-changer for Sea Org members. Security was going around the base at Clearwater and were kicking people out to go home at 11:30 pm. We couldn’t believe it! (It did have a drawback that now sales quotas had to be made during the day, but at least sleep was available.) I heard later on that, quite magically, Freewinds staff were also sent to sleep instead of staying up into the night, and they couldn’t believe it either.

DM’s Authority

For any change to occur in practices, DM personally would need to order it. He does order corrections sometime, like the above example, otherwise he would look like a tyrant to the staff.

And any correction needs to be originated by him. If a staff member writes to him, the communication will go to a local RTC office and a local rep will answer. Your communication will never get to him.

Even if he is asking you a question and you tell him a problem directly, you can never be sure what the outcome will be. The following story was told by someone that participated in such a communication:

In 2013 when the Golden Age of Tech Phase II came out, Executive Directors of all Scientology organizations were called to a meeting at Flag and they got a briefing personally from DM. The Hungarian team was lead by a representative, as the real ED was not able to attend.

At that time all prices for Scientology services were corrected internationally, adjusting them to the monthly wages of an average worker of that country. The average wage level determined for Hungary by the agency hired for this task was 340,000 HUF, (around $1,400). Per my own persona; experience, this number is around 150,000 HUF ($600), and the company made a mistake.

Therefore the cost of services were established at an unreasonably high price, with the Purification program costing about two months’ wages. The person who was representative of the ED brought this up in his communication with DM through a translator. He was taken off his post and he had to undergo serious ethics handling and sec checking.

Degrees of Offenses in Scientology

There are four degrees of harmful acts in Scientology, listed in increasing severity.

  1. Errors
  2. Misdemeanors
  3. Crimes
  4. High Crimes (Suppressive Acts)

Even though I am pretty sure that Freewinds staff think that I pulled my wife out of the Sea Org, it was the other way around. She had been bugging me to leave the Sea Org for a few years. She kept telling me that she wanted kids and she was tired of the abuses. I didn’t want to leave. Flag was comfortable to a degree and I had the high purpose of helping the planet. I always handled her and not reporting it is a crime. Talking to each other about leaving is a suppressive act.

If you want to leave, you are supposed to report it to Ethics and not tell your spouse or anyone else.

On the Freewinds

Then we were promoted to the Ship. The first reactions were sweet from everyone. However these reactions became nasty very soon. Also my pay went from $100 a week to $37 and I had an extremely tough life. But I continued despite everything.

Then I got a hernia and my life became hell, as I wasn’t supposed to lift heavy things, but in the kitchen where I worked, I had to lift all the time.

At the same time I wasn’t able to spend time with my wife. Per the regular schedule, on Saturday morning we had to quickly do our cleaning (till about 10 am) and we were able to go off the shore until 1 pm.

In the first time period I was working in the galley. During this time every Saturday my wife went off the ship in the morning and I was only able to go off in the afternoon, as we had to serve meals to the passengers. We could not go together.

When I changed post and I was able to go off in the regular time Saturday mornings, her schedule also changed most of the time – she had to be on post in the morning and got time off in the evening. Or I had to do my cleaning until about 10 am and she went off 8:30 am and had to come back by 11 am.

It was a continuous upset.

Then I was sent to Taiwan on a project to handle $200,000 debts of a recruit. We failed and I got a Committee of Evidence. We were found guilty of “accepting” the project in the first place (there was no chance not accepting as it was “Command Intention”) and we didn’t “make it go right”. I wasn’t allowed to leave the ship for 3 months and I was getting really claustrophobic. Just imagine that you are only able to go to the small cantine on the ship for three full months where you can only buy protein bars, toothpaste and a few similar items. Other than that you can go to do morning exercise on the dock and that’s it. And I knew someone who had to do this for 8 months.

Our Decision To Leave The Sea Org

My wife Gabi was a very high level auditor, Class IX and auditors always got special restrictions on time off. They are the ones that deliver the services that bring most of the money in, and per LRH, they should be treated with the greatest respect. Today auditors, because of their income potential, are the biggest slaves in the Sea Org.

Maiden Voyage, June 2016, which is a series of briefings by DM for the anniversary of the first sail of the Freewinds. After successful completion, with all staff working their butts off beyond anything you can imagine, the entire ship gets a day off. With over 90 hours of work per week, there are only 3 days like this in the entire year: Maiden Voyage, Sea Org Day and Xmas. The entire crew is waiting for these.

The crew went to the beach and got a movie in the evening.

The Freewinds auditors received a quota of 8 hours of auditing before being able to go off. With this they already lost the opportunity to go to the beach to start with.

My wife did 7 1/2 hours, and she would have made the 8 if there hadn’t been an error by the Examiner, clearing this up by re-watching the video took more than 30 minutes. She was not allowed to go off the ship per the general directions of the Ship’s RTC Rep. Complete injustice from the top. No possibility to appeal.

We were so excited to finally being able to go to the movies together. As a result, I didn’t go either. We watched a movie in the cabin.

This was the time we both decided that we would leave the Sea Org.

The Ship lost their only one Hungarian-speaking auditor because of a few hours of time that she would have spent off production anyways. If you ask me, the person ordering it is the Suppressive Person – the entire ship was terrified to follow even her slightest comments.

There was one more occasion that just drove the nail even deeper into the coffin. I don’t recall the exact time, but it was shortly after maiden Voyage. There was a new movie coming out, maybe it was Tom Cruise.

This is going to be a bit technical but please bear with me, I will try to explain it in simple terms.

In Scientology you can only claim any rewards if you are “upstat” your statistics are up, which on a regular post means that you produced more the last week than the week before. In the case of an auditor, per Sea Org policy written personally by LRH, this is a range range statistic and an auditor needs to audit over 25 hours a week to be upstat. Even though LRH policy cannot be overridden, someone already modified this to 35 hours claiming that he wrote this at a time when circumstances were different.

So my wife audited somewhere around 36 hours the past week and 37 hours the week before. Any 14-year-old cadet in the Sea Org would see that this is considered upstat per both definitions. But not the RTC Rep Ship, Lurie Bellotti. She personally called Ethics and told them that my wife is not upstat as she audited less than the week before and she was not allowed to go off the ship to see the movie. Another nail into the coffin to lose the auditor who many times produced even over 50 hours and personally brought in hundreds of thousands of dollars of business by auditing, calling in public for services that would listen to her, raising funds for the IAS.

Every single person I ever met spoke about her with awe, her sister who is still in the Sea Org in LA also said that people treated her more nicely just by mentioning that she was Gabi’s sister. She was a true upstat that per Scientology policy needed to be rewarded and she was punished instead. Which is an action that is, per LRH, a characteristic of a suppressive person – only rewards down statistics and penalizes up statistics.

My Crimes

As I promised, here are my crimes:

  • Talking to my wife about leaving is a suppressive act, even though “disconnection” is a method that gets heavily used by the Church. But they don’t let you disconnect from them…
  • She was really pushing me, so I agreed to get her pregnant. Unfortunately it didn’t work out for some reason. This is a serious offense and would have been the easy way out, as despite all the rumors, they don’t force you to get an abortion (at least on the ship). There was a Czech couple, that were offloaded shortly before for pregnancy. It took them less than a week.
  • I caused a lot of damage by helping my wife escape as years of training has been invested into her and the production loss is hundreds of thousands of dollars.
  • I myself left, didn’t return when I was told to, another suppressive act.
  • I overworked my senior as she needs to cover my three posts that I had.
  • Discussing internal matters of the Sea Org with non-Sea Org members is against policy.
  • I am committing another suppressive act by publicly posting this and telling the whole world about the injustice.

While I was in the Sea Org, I was incompetent, which is an ethics matter. I will detail this more as it is relevant.

  • Among other things, I was in charge of making sure that the Call Center, where Scientology materials were being sold, was manned up with personnel. When i took this over, every possible person was already assigned to this. When someone left the ship on a mission or for any reason, I was responsible to make sure that the person was replaced. I was incompetent, because I wasn’t able to solve this problem when 2-4-6-8 people were fired out all at the same time and there were no resources.
  • I was also in charge of making sure that the Sea Watches and fire and safety response response teams were manned for the time the ship was sailing and for possible disaster. You probably have an idea that training a helmsman or radarman doesn’t happen overnight, and emergency response personnel also takes a while to train. Now imagine someone decides that Jonathan Hattenbach will from now on be working off the Ship on a Tour and anther person from the response team had been recently sent off also and it is my job to ensure the replacements are in place, trained and approved, within a week… I had no solution and I was therefore incompetent.
  • OT IX and X are “on the horizon”. There is an immense amount of foreign-speaking people going up the auditing levels, especially Russians. Somehow they have more money than Americans. There was already a training program in place to get all auditors through all the updated training courses in addition to the 35-40-50+ hours they need to audit each week. Keep in mind that they also need to do admin between sessions. So I get ordered that these auditors, also the course supervisors, need to learn foreign languages, so that they can deliver confessionals for those coming to the Ship to do OT IX and X in the near but undetermined future. Mark Kimura, who has that look, but is completely American, needed to learn Japanese. He was really suffering with those Japanese characters. Dagmar and Jurg need to learn Russian, etc. I managed to figure out the software, getting them to find computers, installing it, but I failed to find them the time to do it and it was going too slow. Never mind that even after a year of intensive language study it is doubtful that they would be able to hear confessionals in a foreign language – it took me about 4 years of school learning English plus 5 years in Florida to get to this level. Therefore I was incompetent.
  • In September 2016 I was sent to Flag to do a project while my wife stayed in the ship. I was also about to get an operation for my kidney stone. We tried to be in communication via Church email. Unfortunately all e-mail gets read by Ethics and the Ship Ethics Officer is busy, therefore when I sent an e-mail to my wife and she only got it 4 days later. At the staff motels where we lived, the phones are locked up and there was only a certain half hour to 45 minutes available when the thousands of staff were all trying to make their phone calls. Therefore I decided to get a SIM card into my phone and this is how I was able to stay in communication with my own wife. Of course this violates the rules of not having a private phone and this is how eventually I was able to help her escape.
  • I really suck at selling, therefore when I was forced to participate in the Call Center to sell books and lectures, I was incompetent and I wasted over an hour of production time every day.
  • I had a bad habit of leaving post and going to my cabin to see my wife at 11:30 pm, which upset my senior incredibly, as she many times stayed up until 3-4 am at her own choice as production had to be done.
  • I was incompetent in forcing people who had no post replacement and study time to go to study and complete their courses. I didn’t have the sufficient ethics presence to force their seniors to work it out.
  • And yes, I went onto the internet when I went ashore in Aruba or Barbados without getting approval and turning my tablet in for verification afterwards, which is also a refusal to follow the rules, NONCOMPLIANCE, which is a misdemeanor.

If I remember more, I will update this post, but I think you can see how this works and what is considered a crime.

Please leave your comments, please share this with everyone.



  1. Karen#1 | | Reply

    People leave on upsets and disharmony not because of crimes. See link above.

  2. Joe Grice | | Reply

    When I first heard that datum I couldn’t believe it, I emailed David Mayo but he isn’t allowed to talk about Scientology. I went to the Toronto Reference Library and got an old Book Book of Basics from about 1970. On the Desire, Enforced, Inhibit(prevent) Scale there was falsified. Reality is basicly agreement, Lying is a Falsified Reality which upsets people. There is another scale, the Know to Mystery scale; effort, emotion, eating, sex and others. Looking is on that scale too, looking can be also defined as attention or money. So no money, no food, no sleep upset people. I have also noticed that creative processing from 1952 has dropped out. I have a theory that if you were to combine those two pieces of Tech then one can discover and erase the source of upsets. For example: No money, mock up or visualize someone flowing gold dust on you. I think that it harmful to the PC(the person receiving auditing) to have counter survival acts(Overts and Witholds) pulled over ARCX’s(upsets.) Now there is sex and it’s result children which I’ll not mention in polite company.

  3. Joe Grice | | Reply

    In Scientology we are taught that Security Checking(confessionals) are done against a moral code, for example: the Jo’burgh or the Way to Happiness, while this may offer some relief I am more inclined to believe that is should be done against abilities. If one uses his ability to communicate to harm others then he loses his ability to communicate. It is his basic goodness or ethics kicking in to prevent himself from hurting others. In scientology the person himself is called a thetan and is considered an immortal spiritual being. What are all the abilities that a thetan possesses, telepathy, telekinesis? I sure others can added to this list.

  4. n.p. | | Reply

    Well done, you got out of scientology, now get scientology out of your selves.

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